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 In the interest of my New Year's resolution
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 to not talk about magic the gathering anymore...
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 let's do a quick one about another formerly
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 beloved magical IP.
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 “How I wish for J.K. Rowling to write more wizard 
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 stories and she wrote Fantastic Beast”
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 This may be a hot take, but the
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 entire Harry Potter universe has an elephant in
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 the room about how its entire plot works.
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 Wizards are dumb.
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 And I don't mean the IP is bad
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 and you shouldn't like it.
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 That's left as an exercise for the reader.
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 I mean the wizarding world is canonically top
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 to bottom infested with fucking morons.
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 Of course it would be.
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 Point one, think about how eagerly your brain
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 will offload thought.
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 Quick, when's your sister's dog's birthday?
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 Fuck knows, you own a calendar.
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 Give driving directions from your high school to
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 your current favorite bar.
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 Who knows, just pull up GPS.
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 Do you have the speed of sound memorized?
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 Einstein would just look it up.
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 So it follows that wizards have an attitude
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 of waving a stick and saying some words
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 works reliably enough.
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 Who cares why?
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 Point two, there is precisely one catch-all
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 gen-ed class at Hogwarts.
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 Here's a fun game.
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 The next time someone says “they should teach
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 (blank) in schools”, ask them what existing courses
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 they're going to get rid of to make room.
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 Student schedules have been over full forever -
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 And at Hogwarts, who knows what they discarded
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 for magic.
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 Anyway, think about how many plot holes are
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 filled in:
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 1. why are wizards hiding from muggles in
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 spite of Avada Kedavra?
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 There's some conflicting information in the books -
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 it's The "killing curse", implying it's the only one.
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 But for example, sectum-sempra would kill someone, eventually.
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 Avada Kedavra is apparently guaranteed instant death if
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 we ignore Barty claiming he could tank a
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 room full and come out of it with
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 a nosebleed.
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 The whole reason Harry is a celebrity is
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 that he's apparently the only known person to
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 have survived at once.
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 So apparently every kid with a wand is
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 walking around with instant death on a stick.
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 How did wizards get persecuted into hiding by
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 muggles when they can fly and muggles were
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 still horse-centric?
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 Because they don't have as much control of
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 magic as they tell you they do.
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 If a wand and the knowledge of Avada
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 Kedavra is a handgun with infinite ammo, it
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 still has to be aimed and it takes
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 time to execute.
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 So maybe it's feasible for muggles to beat
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 any given wizard's UnFoRgIvAbLe DaRk MaGiC by sending
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 two dudes with blunderbusses, three to be extra sure.
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 2. why do wizards have to enslave house
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 elves to cook and clean when there's a
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 clean-up-the-room-spell?
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 Has there never been a great wizard Microwavicus Boyardee?
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 4. look at all the construction -
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 the Weasleys just magic'd up their house and
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 whatever building came out is as good as
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 they're ever going to get.
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 Magical construction predicted vibe coding by 20 years.
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 Hogwarts has a whimsical labyrinth of stairs with
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 lots of moving parts, surely because a spiral
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 staircase with regular landings just never occurred to them.
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 Wizards have tardis-camp-tents and yet not
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 every wizard rents a cheap storage unit to
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 store a port key to their palatial mansion.
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 5. are spells invented or discovered?
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 We see zero evidence that any wizard has
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 ever had an inkling of curiosity about the
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 fundamental nature of magic itself.
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 “You dare use my own spell against me Potter”
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 Snape apparently created sectum sempra -
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 Did he upload that to the leylines?
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 Or did he just go “wow, wave wand
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 in this motion, say these words... 
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 conveniently it works.
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 I don’t know why but it’ll work for you!”
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 Harry's too dumb to have ever invented a
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 spell, surely, but Hermione must have.
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 6. why do evil characters keep demonstrating how
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 much they don't care about their loyal subordinates
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 but going through trouble to bust them out
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 of jail?
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 Because those henchmen are an unfathomably rare specimen
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 of a coworker with some basic competency.
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 3. hi, I tore the very fabric of
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 time and space to move this point to
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 the back.
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 They issued a time travel locket to a
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 third grader.
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 To be honest, none of the rest of
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 these even matter.
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 No wonder the "fEaReD dArK lOrD" who lost
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 a 1v1 against literally a baby got brought
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 back to life and had the world reconquered
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 in a few months.
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 You might wonder why I haven't touched on
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 the seemingly paradoxical rarity of liquid luck.
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 There is a good in-universe justification for
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 why it isn't dispensed out of fountains every
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 10 feet.
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 Welcome to the real video, the actual point
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 I'm getting around to.
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 The narrative function of Felix Felicis is actually
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 great.
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 Even ignoring toxicity, it can't possibly not warp
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 your perspective.
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 Analogy, suppose we invented a chemically perfect painkiller.
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 This hypothetical wonder drug has no other side
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 effects, isn't toxic, isn't directly addictive, and is
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 somehow so cheap that everyone has a lifetime
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 supply.
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 You should still abstain.
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 Pain is data and if this drug is
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 just obscuring that data from you, you won't
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 realize that your damage is outpacing your healing.
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 Do you like sunlight?
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 If not for the emotional reaction of avoiding
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 sunburn, how long do you think it will
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 be before you give yourself skin cancer?
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 Likewise, Felix Felicis offers to do too much
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 for you.
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 I'm sure you know someone who has atypical
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 advantages working for them and thinks that's just
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 how the world works.
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 “You live in a bubble where people do
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 what you want and tell you what you
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 want to hear.”
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 Because as Churchill didn't quite say - “we shape
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 our tools and afterwards our tools shape us”.
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 A person acclimates to their tools.
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 Like I referenced above, no one can remember
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 birthdays because calendar software is a solved problem.
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 No one can do mental math because we
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 reliably have a calculator with us.
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 Countless rhymes to share intuitions about tomorrow's weather
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 have been made obsolete by the National Weather Service.
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 This is all great. Victories of engineering. But
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 it's still not okay to remain entirely ignorant.
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 Calendar software is a solved problem thanks to
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 the VCAL standard, so an entity that obscures
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 it from you is trying to unsolve the
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 problem and make you dependent on them so
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 they can raise their price.
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 A calculator is a great thing to have
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 with you, so imagine if your device's owner
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 didn't deign to give you a calculator.
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 In both of those cases, you'd offload your
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 thought to a service, which then stops.
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 So shape your tools to be sure the
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 way they shape you back is acceptable.